Ezzus’s Golden Ticket NFL Picks: Week 17

Ezzus Golden Ticket NFL picks

“Wow!” (Owen Wilson voice) I actually had a decent week 16 Golden Ticket with my NFL picks. With a 2-1 record, it was one of my better weeks for my NFL picks. My only stain was that horrible Chiefs pick. I should’ve known that was a trap game. I promise not to be a moron this week. 

I’m feeling a 3-0 week, but don’t be surprised when my NFL picks go 0-3 because that’s how this season has been going. Just when I think things are getting better, I am totally wrong on all my picks. 

With an overall record of 20-29, I still have a chance at a .500 record — especially when I’m picking playoff games. Spoiler alert! It probably won’t happen. 

This week, I’m only using teams whose games impact the playoffs, making things a little spicier. As always, we’ll be using Bovada for the lines. 

Baltimore Ravens (-13) vs Cincinnati Bengals

After the Steelers game a month ago, the Ravens looked like they weren’t making the playoffs. They were 6-5 and basically had to win out in order to secure a spot in the playoffs. But, Lamar Jackson and company did just that. The Ravens are on a 4-game win streak and they will make it 5 on Sunday. 

I think the Ravens are going to come out and punch the Bengals in the mouth early. They are heavily motivated to make the playoffs and winning gets them in.

The Ravens will go up big early, so the -13 line does not scare me at all. The Bengals are trash and won’t be able to keep up with this rejuvenated Ravens team. 

Dallas Cowboys (-1) vs New York Giants 

It’s crazy that the Cowboys have a legit shot at the playoffs. 3 weeks ago, this team was looking at a top-10 pick in the draft. Now, they have a chance at representing the horrible NFC East in the playoffs.

Andy Dalton had another great game last week with 377 yards and 3 touchdowns. He has easily been the reason for the Cowboys’ 3-game win streak. Dalton is hot and so are the Cowboys. This is an easy win and a surprising division crown. 

The line for this game is set at -1 in favor of the Cowboys. It’s essentially a pick’em game, but you get slightly better value in picking against the spread. The Cowboys will easily cover this, as they are beating the Giants by at least a touchdown. 

Pittsburgh Steelers vs Cleveland Browns (-9)

Yes, the Browns did lose to the trash Jets last week. Let’s not forget Baker Mayfield was throwing to practice squad receivers. Now, he has Jarvis Landry and 3 other receivers back from the COVID list. We are bound to see better production from Mayfield this week.

The Browns draw the Steelers without Big Ben, as he and others are resting this week in preparation for the postseason. So, the alleged racist Mason Rudolph is getting the start. Myles Garrett now has even more motivation to play at his best this week. He has a chance to make the playoffs for the first time, and gets the chance to hit Rudolph legally. 

The Steelers won’t be able to move the ball down the field effectively, with how much havoc Garrett will make in the backfield. I’m predicting Garrett has 3 sacks this game and Rudolph exits the game with a “concussion.” The Browns win big. I’m predicting a 14-point victory for Cleveland, as the team clinches a playoff berth for the first time since the 2002-2003 season. 

If you take this playoff-determining Golden Ticket and slap $20 on it, you’ll win $119. You can then buy a wonderful t-shirt at our shop

ALL LUV,

EZZZUS

Failed fantasy football commish. Boomer truther. Voted 1 out of 2 best young studs at Best Buy, but then I got fired. Marvin Jones beat my ass at the Super Bowl (I have proof). Josh Norman would not beat my ass and I was disappointed. I also had better seats at the Super Bowl than Ben Shapiro. This is my biggest flex. Had a sit down meeting with Kirk Cousins and his camp about his recruitment to the New York Jets. I’m pretty sure he didn’t sign with the team because of me, but I still had a sit down meeting with Kirk Cousins and his camp ( I also have proof of this). I suffer each year watching Jets, Knicks and Mets games. Co-owner, Podcast Co-Host and somewhat of a Journalist. I feel like this bio is just one big flex but most of this stuff is lame,. Except for the Ben Shapiro one, that’s super not lame. ALL LUV EZZUS

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