I am ashamed of myself. Not only did I go 1-2 in in NFL picks last week but, I let you down.
For that, I am truly sorry. I’m sorry to anyone who took my advice and lost. I hope none of you lost your house because you took advice from a moron.
My record stands at a modest 3-3 for this. I guess I still have some credibility left. If you don’t believe I know what I’m talking about, take a gander at this week’s Freaks and Cheeks article. I’m doing much better over there.
As we did the past two weeks I’m getting the lines for my NFL picks from Bovada. This week I’m going with an all underdog card for my NFL picks. I’m calling it the all underdog surefire, can’t miss golden ticket presented by The Challenge Sports.
Chicago Bears (+150) at Atlanta Falcons
This pick is easy. The Falcons are hot booty cheeks and they stink. They were up 20-0 on the Cowboys, and they let them come back to win. How do you play in the NFL on special teams and still not know the receiving team can pick the ball up at any time?
I can’t see the offense moving the ball well against Chicago’s defense. Atlanta is not good. Dan Quinn and Adam Gase are in a race to see who gets fired first. At the end of this game, Quinn will be in the lead. That is until Adam Gase loses to the Colts. Here’s a bonus pick that must be on every parlay, taking the Colts -11.5 is a lock.
I do have concerns with Mitch Trubisky playing quarterback. But I think the defense makes him only put up 21 for a win.
San Francisco 49ers at New York Giants (+165)
The Giants were the only winning pick I had last week and I’m sticking with them. I know Daniel Jones hasn’t played great, but he has kept the team in the game while playing two good defenses back to back weeks.
With the injuries San Fran has sustained the past two weeks, they are vulnerable. I think this week the Giants have a chance to win. Nick Mullens is not beating this team. If he was going to be a starter, someone would have given him a starting contract.
The only thing that should be scaring the Giants should be scared of this week is tearing their ACLs on the new MetLife turf. This should be an easy dub for the home dogs. Always bet on home dogs, it’s easy money.
MORE FROM EZZUS: The Jets Have a Big Decision Coming Up
Los Angeles Rams (+105) at Buffalo Bills
I understand that the Rams are on back to back east coast trips. That didn’t hurt them last week and I don’t think it hurts them this week. Yes, they are going up against Josh Allen who’s on “fire.” But, I think he comes back down to Earth and struggles against a good D. When you play the Jets and the Dolphins back to back weeks, of course you’re going to do good.
The Rams have been sneaky good this year and it shows. Vegas has them at a slight underdog. It knows this team is dangerous and that the Bills aren’t as good as the media thinks.
I think Allen struggles against a good defense and makes some bad decisions, opening the door for the Rams to start the season 3-0.
Throw 20 bills on this parlay and win yourself $257, you won’t regret it especially with the PS5 coming out soon. #Sonyallday
ALL LUV
EZZUS